Saints vs. Rams

/r/nfl Game Thread Analysis
January 20th, 2019

Recent Threads

Summary

29099 comments

145.495 comments/minute

7766 total authors

3.7469 avg comments each

F-Bombs Dropped*

*this accounts derivatives of "fuck", which includes "fuuuuuk" and "fook", as well as the phonetic "phuck", and also acronyms such as "wtf" and "gtfo". "Fuck dallas" counts double, as per tradition.

2578 Fucks Given through 8.859% of comments, at a rate of 8.593 FPM

This was a high fucks-rate game thread. Here are some examples:

/u/tj3_23 "Fuckity fuck fuck fuck. I hope Kermit or the Dark Lord can do a better job than this"

/u/DubsComin4DatASS "Security needs to bring that whistle motherfucker out back and beat the dogshit out of him. Fuck you whistle man"

/u/ye_olde_bowlingalley "so i was in my bathroom a second ago tryna unclog the toilet after this massive whopper i dropped in there, and i started thinking about how much that gargantuan piece of shit reminded me of the saints and how i wanted to take a plunger and fucking obliterate it into another plain of existence"

/u/iia "Thats fucking football right there. None of that pansy ass dick tugging smile for the camera bullshit. Men puke, men poop on the field, men deliver their new born baby on the side lines. Fucking hard core dick in the ass butterball foosball fuck it chuck it game time shit."


Ebbs and Fucks

Top Bomb Droppers

/u/suchcoldsuchcomfort gave 13 fucks.

/u/ArcherDuchess gave 11 fucks.

/u/blizzfreak gave 11 fucks.

Game Thread All Stars

MVP

/u/rocharox

"Gotta respect the Saints fans. For less than that Philly people would murder those refs."

"Can someone kick the crap of the person with the whistle?"

All-Thread 1st Team

/u/Axiomatic8 "Jimmy Buffett singing the national anthem sounds like my grandpa singing the national anthem"

/u/weareallscum "Don’t let this distract you from the fact that Globo Gym gave up a four man lead to Average Joe’s Gym in the Las Vegas International Dodgeball Open."

/u/adudenamedrf "So the new Lincoln commercial with Matthew McConaughey has him chilling at someone's house during a party of some kind looking uninterested as fuck, gets ADD as hell and starts ripping pool trick shots on the table instead of interacting with the people there, and then leaves immediately afterwards without saying goodbye and drives away silently chuckling to himself, while showing no benefits or features of the car being advertised. It does such a good job of conveying why we should buy the new Lincoln."

/u/Quinnster247 "Chat is again moving so fast that it will be nearly impossible for anyone to find out that I do in fact love my mom"

/u/Bamaborn97 "Rams fans are banned from talking about refs for all eternity if they win"

Angriest Comments

#1 Score: 0.931277

/u/PrincessFromAlderaan "Im fairly neutral about this game but holy shit that no call made me angry"

#2 Score: 0.92212

/u/DeltaEchoXray "It takes a special kind of asshole to constantly blow a fucking whistle during a game."

#3 Score: 0.913541

/u/GoatseGapAnalyst "No horse in this race, but fuck the refs for that fucking gift to the Rams. Here's hoping the Pats hang 50 on them...fuck me, it's come to me rooting for the goddamn Pats. Fuck this timeline."

Tentative Comments

#1 Score: 0.999241

/u/rocharox "Music before the break anyone? It goes " something something AGAIN"

#2 Score: 0.99856

/u/StThomasAquina "Sorry Rams sideline. I dont know that your gettin any PI calls."

#3 Score: 0.996813

/u/the_toddfather "Ok Gurley has to secretly have like appendicitis or something. This doesn't make any sense"

Happiest Comments

#1 Score: 0.947448

/u/yeett_ "The 20 seconds of no whistles was bliss"

#2 Score: 0.908981

/u/rocharox "I'm Brazilian and I love my country, but the American anthem is really amazing."

#3 Score: 0.895101

/u/Babblerabla "The greatest evil I could imagine, the saints winning the first superbowl in the dome, has been driven from my mind. I'm so thankful for the Rams on this day."

Saddest Comments

#1 Score: 0.944373

/u/counter4 "a wave of crippling depression hit me so it's hard to enjoy this game"

#2 Score: 0.925336

/u/Kajeetlol "The life of a saints fan is depression"

#3 Score: 0.907916

/u/TheseBonesAlone "Parkey watches that commercial and cries."

Confident Comments

#1 Score: 0.998186

/u/AndyReidsBBQ "That whistling has to stop. Has to."

#2 Score: 0.989922

/u/MtSopris "These refs should never be allowed near a pro sports game again. Absolutely ridiculous."

#3 Score: 0.983213

/u/mji6980-4 "The playoffs absolutely need different overtime rules. It should be a guaranteed full extra fifteen minutes. The fact that the first touchdown still ends it is crazy"

Alcohol References

147 drink references

/u/AngryAnkles "BEER"

/u/blAzeAlldAy "Im just gonna drink until I cant hear it"

/u/brianjcool "I made the executive call to start drinking now because the wait for our game is killing me"

Overall Thread Sentiment

13.715% happy comments

15.003% angry comments

Most Positive Author

/u/Secret_Troll, with comments like:
"I like the whistle, it makes me want to dance"

Most Negative Author

/u/suchcoldsuchcomfort, with comments like:
"That was a weak ass drive. How the fuck you only gonna get 3 off that. I mean Jesus. I fully expect the Rams offense to come out now and get 7"